My Adventures in Bedsharing (or How I Bruised My Spleen)

We were never able to bedshare (or cosleep, however you want to term it) with Turtle. When he was finally discharged from the NICU, he came home with a heart monitor that sprouted electrodes and wires. Snuggling with him in bed was just not an option.

We were also remarkably lucky in that Turtle was a big fan of sleeping on his own. To this day, he adores his crib. He actually just adores sleeping, in general. He sleeps from about 6pm to 6:30am every day, and take a 2-3 hour nap every morning. The few mornings we've tried bringing him into bed with us (in an attempt to catch a few extra Zs) have ended with lots of attempts at bouncing and climbing all over us, but no actual interest in laying down.

Which brings me to the point of this post.

On my recent trip to my grandparents' house, Turtle attempted to completely boycott sleep. It was brutal. After trying just about everything in my bag of tricks, I ended up going to bed early every night and bringing him into the futon with me. He didn't go right to sleep like he normally does, but I want to share with you, my readers, my experience from Night 2.

We went into the guest room at about 8:30pm. Now two and a half hours after his normal bedtime. I laid on the futon, and he wandered around the dark room, watching Nick Jr on the small tv on very low volume. When he finally got sleepy, around 9:30, he said "Go up?" and I put him between me and the wall.

He sat there for a while. Just sucking his thumb, hugging Original Monkey. Watching. A few times, he flopped down, and what happened was honestly one of the most beautiful things.

The Act of Turtle Falling Asleep.

It was so wonderful to hear him start to calm down. His breathing slowed. He started focusing on little things around him: a shadow on the ceiling, the fan, my hand. He laid down one way, and held Original Monkey over his eyes for a minute, and then flipped over on his elbows and tummy. He put his head down on the pillow, facing me with his huge blue eyes. He petted my cheek, and then my shoulder.

Turtle: Mommy?
Me: Yes, honey.
Turtle: Daddy?
Me: Daddy's at home. We'll see him a few days.
Turtle: Days..... Puggies?
Me: The puggies are with Daddy. We'll see them in a few days.
Turtle: Days.... Mommy.

And then he petted my shoulder again, flipped on his back, tucked up against me with his head under my chin, and drifted off to sleep.

I stayed awake a long time, listening to him breathing, watching the rise and fall of his chest in the light from the tv. It was the most amazing and beautiful thing.

And watching him wake up was even more incredible. Seeing his eyes open and fall on me, and then having him snuggle back in to hang out. Wow.

It was almost worth having him drop an elbow to my spleen when he declared "All done!" and tried to scale me in order to start his day.