Mom vs. Crockpot. Round 1.

Confession Time.

I'm afraid of crockpots.

There. I've said it. Laugh if you must.

There's just something.... untrustworthy about putting some stuff in a pot, plugging it in and walking away. And I'm also uncomfortable with the idea of leaving something plugged in, especially if I'm not home. Which I usually am. But still. It goes against my nature.

Also? That Sandra Lee on Food Network with all her generic Cream of X soups? Makes. Me. Twitch.

But there's been a buzz.

Talk of oh-so-easy pulled pork and buffalo chicken. And brisket. Heck, I don't even *like* brisket. But that doesn't mean I don't want to be able to cook it in such a way that people drool for more.

I'm crazy like that.

So I did some serious research. I posted on Facebook and a message board and asked if I should get a crockpot. And the resounding answer was yes.

Hey. You can't argue with quantitative results.

I went to Target.

I came home with this. The big selling points? It was under $25. And it was red.



See how it gives me the side eye?



I also had a brisket. 1.75lbs of it. So I looked for recipes and came across one called Beef Brisket in Beer.

I trust beer. Beer has never steered me wrong. Not like that Captain Morgan. But I digress.

First, I chopped up some onions.



Then I trimmed the fat from the brisket (Here's where it gets confusing. The recipe said to both trim the fat, but also to put the meat in the crockpot fat side up. So I trimmed a little fat, so that there was something for the "up" part).



A little fat side up.



I covered the meat with the onions.



Sprinkled with bay leaves.



And I had some mushrooms, so I threw those in too. At this point, we have departed from the actual "Beef Brisket in Beer" recipe, and gone off on a tangent. I was informed by an expert (a friend via AIM) that "You cannot mess this up." I view that more as a challenge than an endorsement.



In a separate bowl, I mixed about 3/4 cup of beer,



1/8 cup of ketchup,



Some chili powder and 1 clove of garlic, minced,



1 tbsp of brown sugar,



And black pepper, kosher salt and thyme.



I whisked it all up and poured it over the meat, onions and mushrooms.



I set the crockpot on low. The plan I devised upon consultation with aforementioned expert was that I would leave it on low from 10:30am until I got home at 3:30pm, and then I could kick it up to high until dinner time. Approximately 7:30pm. Eastern Standard Time.



Crockpotting away...



Still going.

At this point, probably about 4pm (EST), MacGyver poked his nose into my kitchen.

MacGyver: "It smells good. Are you going to mix it?"
Me: No.
MacGyver: ::concerned face::



At about 7, MacGyver re-entered my kitchen.

MacGyver: So it's almost done?
Me: Yes.
MacGyver: And you still haven't mixed it or looked in there?
Me: You're not supposed to.
MacGyver: Are you sure?
Me: That's the whole point of the crockpot. Set it and forget it. Ha ha.
MacGyver: But don't you think you should...?
Me: Yeah, no. Do you want to take over dinnertime in the house?
MacGyver: Never mind.

Right before serving.



Beef Brisket in Beer. A la Me.



I served it with yellow rice and green beans and almonds.



Now for the verdict.

MacGyver. Loved. It. He had two enormous helpings. He thought it had great flavor and texture. We have leftovers for him to have a sandwich or whatever. He's excited.

Me. Eh. Well. I *get* it. I understand that roasting meat til it's at the point where it shreds easily or falls apart in the oven is a big, fat pain in the arse, so this is ideal. The flavor was exactly like I envision pretty much all crockpotted meat to be, so I wasn't wowed. But I have high hopes for pulled pork and chicken.

And hot buttered rum.

Me: 1
Crockpot: 1.

Til we meet again.