Day 2: 30 Day Shred - level 1

Let's assess the damage.

I woke up this morning and was surprised to realize that every. single. muscle. in. my. body is on fire. With the exception of my butt and my inner thighs. This puzzles me. It means that either a) my butt and thighs are in such exceptional condition that not even Jillian Michaels can help them or b) I'm not doing something right. My money is on B.

So back downstairs I go, very gingerly. It would do me no good if my legs gave out and I took a tumble. Broken bones are certainly not going to get me out of my 3-2-1 workout! Broken bones are for sissy-babies! I'm not a sissy-baby! Well, maybe, I am. But I'm trying not to be!

The minute Mr. Turtle-monster goes down for his nap, I shove DH into his office and get back on my mat. I think fondly back to yoga, where such mantras as "this is not a competition", "do what makes you feel comfortable" and "there's no shame in holding the wall" were the norm. Sigh, how fondly I remember those days.

But enough of that! We are here to work!

You know, in the 30DS warmup, there is a distinct lack of step-touch-step-touch. I can do step-touch. I can ROCK the sweet bejesus out of step-touch. But alas, there is none of that here.

Back to the mat for push-ups. I am reminded that we are NOT "phoning it in." We are here to "give it our all." I wonder, through my fog of pain, how I am supposed to do 40 seconds of pushups on arms that seem to have all the strength of limp linguine.

I cheat. I skip one this go-around. I can't help it. I either skip it or fall on my face and break something. At some point, Jillian makes some snide comment about how Natalie and Anita never cheat when Jillian's back is turned. How did she know???

However, once the first sequence is mercifully done, things move a little bit more easily. I'm pleasantly surprised. And I swear if I poke at my abs just under my ribs, it's a little tighter.

Of course, this also frees up my time to think. Jillian spends an awful lot of time traipsing around, talking about stuff. She only does about 1/4 of the exercises that Anita and Natalie do. I think Anita and Natalie need to say something about that. They're doing all the work and Jillian's getting all the credit. That's just not right.

And then, 22 minutes after we started, it's over. All my limbs are still attached. I'm not bleeding or passing out. This is all very positive.

I let DH know that he is free to leave the office (there are two things I will not do in front of him, and working out is one of them). He assures me that he was listening for loud thumps and/or crashes and has 911 on speed dial, just in case. He's a good man.

Day 3 tomorrow. Cheer me on, reader!